| Crossing Time | 交差時間 (Story written and soon to be published by KRH) | |
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| Topic Started: Sep 1 2010, 03:05 PM (876 Views) | |
| Other Kris | Sep 1 2010, 03:05 PM Post #1 |
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RPG Maker Ace? Gotta win!
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(This time around, I won't cut shit out. I will literally write the novel, not short details from the manga) (If you see "___" it is supposed to be an indent for the start of a new paragraph) Chapter 1: I go playing with explosives! ___It is Sunday morning, heading up to my club activities this year. It autumn and all the trees are turning a golden brown color, and falling down to my feet where ever I go. Every which way I see people going down the streets of New York. Everyone was off to their morning duties or off to Sunday school. It wasn't like I had to go, I just felt bored so I decided to go. Oh, right, my club involves music. We usually do school performances often for a grade on our progress. I was supposed to play a performance on the first day of school, and since I play the guitar pretty well, I decided it wouldn't be that bad to play the first song. ___The walk there wasn't that bad except for the fact I kept running into people, because it is about that time of day. I often pass stores that either vacant with 1 or 2 people working there, or packed full of people in there. The hardest part was getting my lunch for today because my parents were to busy rushing off to church. After crossing the cross walk of the road, I bumped in to a girl about half head's length shorter than me. She had golden blond hair, but near the end of hair, it turned a red color. When she looked up at me, I can see a dark red eyes, (completely not normal) with a golden glow from the sun. She smiled and stepped back a foot or so. ___"Sorry for bumping into you like that, I should really watch where I am going." ___"No problem, it was my fault. Sorry if I caused you any trouble." ___She rushed off without saying anything to me. She probably had places to go like everyone else around here. She looked like my age, and I believe I have seen her somewhere before, but I am not sure where I can put my fingers on it. She was really cute, with a style of her own, and if I have to say so, she pulled it off really well. The way she had her bangs, reminded me of some Japanese mangas I used to read. ___When I got to school, everyone was walking into for practice. There were quite a few people there, like thirty of forty int he club. It was quite popular because you got show just how skillful you are with instruments. I myself play the guitar, and I have been for some time. I am so good, I got to play head liner for 3 years straight. This year I get to play opener which is even better because everyone gets warmed up from you, and if you suck, everyone else does, so it seems very prestigious if you play as this part well. ___When I got into the band room, everyone was either fiddling with their instruments, tuning, configuring, or just practicing. It was a pretty decent sized room with many posters of all the famous rock stars people bring in. My friend Nicholas was adjusting the string height for his guitar. ___"Hey Nick, are you excited for tomorrow?" ___"Sure am! I get to play head liner since you got opener. The orchestrator will be going before me. It seems they got a pretty original piece going on over there." ___"Is that so? We'll make sure to show them up real good!" ___"You bet!" ___We bumped fist, and I picked up my guitar that was lying next to him. It looked polished, so the silver metallic shined brightly. The bridge on it looked sick, some one must have replaced it with a new graphic. I smiled at it, and then strummed it, and saw that it didn't rattle. It was finely tuned, and the only other person here with know how with it is Nick, so I decided to boldly ask him if he did it. ___"Hey Nick, did you fix up my guitar?" ___"Sure did! Seeing how we'll be playing a dual show at the end, I decided it was best for both our guitars to sound the best they could be." ___"Thanks Nick, your the man!" ___"Anything for you, Damian." ___How rude of me! I never introduced myself. My name is Damian Kiskae. People can never pronounce my name right, so I usually ignore people when they call me by my last name. I have long straight brown hair. It's a tad bit long, just long enough to cover my ears. I have deep dark blue eyes. Girls say they're really pretty but I think they look average... I have a good body build, a six pack, strong muscles, all because I took soccer for a sport 5 years in a row. Nick on the other hand is skinny, boney. He has long hair like I do, but it curls at the end, blonde hair as well, and scar on his forehead. It's hard to see it when he has his bangs, but occasionally during PE, it shows itself, and trust me, it looks painful. ___Anyway, I sat down and began to play my guitar. After Nick finished with his tuning, he plugged into my amp, and played along. We sounded good, so goo din fact, if you looked around, no one else was practicing or fixing up, they were just listening to use bang on the guitar. Yes, I use that term because we have no actual music were are doing, we just do what sounds awesome. ___When we stopped, we turned around to see everyone looking at us. Nick is usually cool about this, but I don't like it when people stare. It makes me really uneven. Shortly after, we got clapping and cheering. It made me happy that our bad playing was so good. ___"Not bad guys!" ___"Yeah, wish I played the guitar." ___"Could you teach me how to play?" ___"You guys are so cool!" ___The crowd around us liked how we played improvisationally, and I myself was impressed how in sync we were during our practice. This really warmed me up for our upcoming show. ___The afternoon, as I was heading home, not only was it hard to get around, I also had to lug my guitar home because I needed to practice for the show. In New York, if you don't have your hand in you pocket where you keep your wallet, you will guarantee you will lose it. Lucky for me, I wasn't paying attention, and some kid stole it. I was looking for him up and down but I never managed to find him. After running on a rampage for an hour straight, I decided to head home. As I was crossing the bridge with a small river underneath, I found someone going through some money. When I walked passed, I can see my ID showing through the clear plastic of it. I quickly set my guitar down, and jumped him. He was comparably weak to some other guys, but he definitely can throw a punch. ___After getting my wallet, I see some guy running off with my guitar, and he was literally sprinting at top speed. There was no way I can run that fast with my shoes on. Even if I were to take them off, I would have to catch up, which probably be impossible with the crowds that are here now. I kicked the wall in anger. I couldn't believe I got robbed once, but twice, in one day! After getting off the bridge, I stopped inside the mart on the side of the road. I got a bite to eat, went back outside to get some air. I sat in the alley on the side where I usually eat. It was a pretty well kept alley with flowers along the sides, and trimmed grass that smelled like it was cut not to long ago. The bench on the side was barely used, and I probably am the only one that uses it. ___After scarfing down an entire egg role, I tossed the rapper in the trash can next to me, and got up. I wiped the crumbs off my shirt, and began to walk out- ___"Woah!" ___I find myself on the ground atop the same girl I bumped into earlier. She was wearing a skirt like she did before with a white school blouse. ___"Oh man, that hurt a lot... Oh crap, I am so sorry!" ___"No no, it's my fault." ___I got off her, and she stood up. She didn't recognize me at first, but then she got up really close to my face. It made me blush a bit, so took a step back. She smiled and then mouthed something I couldn't make out. I thought it was English, but I could have been mistaken. ___"Hey, look, I'm really sorry for bumping into you again." ___"No problem, but seeing you a second time, I guess it's time to make introductions." ___"Right, my name is Damian." ___"My name is Himari." ___"That's a strange name, it's not American is it?" ___"Nope! It's actually Japanese." ___"Ah I see, so your part Japanese?" ___"Yup!" ___Well that makes sense, after all, she looks like a girl who just jumped out of a manga. She still had that sweet looking smile on her face, but some how she felt like she wanted to ask me something. I decided to just leave it as is, seeing as how we just meet, and that would be just plain awkward. ___She waved at me when I left, and I lifted my hand back at her to say my good bye as I usually do with everyone. When I got home, I decided to pull out my favorite guitar, which I rarely use on stage, and more for personal use. It looks so nice, so Nick won't be mad at me (not that much I guess) to tell him all his work got stolen. The money box under my bed fell out, which gave me an idea to pay back Nick when I got the chance, but I knew I had enough in my wallet, so I just put it all back, and slid it back under my bed. ___The following day, it was the first day of school. I was happy to see it was turning out well. My friend Nick was hanging out int he front waiting for the bell. When I got over to him, I saw that he was talking to a bunch of sophomores. They were cute, especially the blonde one to the left. Nick is arguably better looking than me, so I decided to let him hit on them. ___The bell rang after I told him about my summer vacation, but not enough time to mention what happened yesterday. I felt guilty leaving this situation unattended, but he would find out eventually. Lately when I ever get a chance to talk to him, it's either when he's flirting with a bunch of girls, or to busy in work to talk to me. ___That afternoon, an hour before we get on stage, we were prepping the stage with everything we needed. We set a back drop for orchestra, as well as speakers for the guitarist, vocalists, and everyone else. Finally when we got done, it was 20 minutes before we had to go on. When we sat down opening our guitar cases when I began to tell him. ___"Look man, I kind of got robbed, and some dude jacked my guitar. Sorry about losing all your hard work, so to make it up for you, I will buy a new guitar for you." ___"Really? Bummer, that's too bad, oh well. You don't have to go out of your way with that. It'll eventually turn up. If he tries to sell it, it will come on record because it is the only one of it's kind." ___"Oh I forgot, it was a present from your father on your birthday, and we worked on it since then." ___"Yeah too bad it's gone, but at least you still have a guitar to use." ___"I brought my favorite one too, it looks as good as the other one, but it doesn't have that killer bridge..." ___"I know, let's just slap on a new one." ___"We have more?" ___"Sure we do, I'll go and get it, sit tight, it'll be a second." ___What a relief that was off my chest. I thought he would freak out, but he was right though, it would turn up. The guitar was an Ibanez, with a custom fender, and a 22kt gold plated bridge with some pretty epic designs. We spent hundreds of dollars messing with it, and when my last birthday came around, he felt bad that he couldn't stay in town long enough to hang out, so he gave me it. I felt guilty taking it, but we always shared it. That's why were good friends. ___A moment later, I was playing my hardest when one of my other friends named Jordon came up and sat next to me. ___"Yo, Damian." ___"Hey Jordon." ___Jordon was 6 foot 3, and tall guy, extremely strong, and plays basketball. He plays the bass and will be operating the mixer in the back for us. He may look scary with his buzz cut, and a permanent scowl on his face, but you'll never find someone as kind as this guy. When he was little, he had a habit of picking up stray dogs and taking care of them until someone adopted them. ___Just then I realized he had someone behind him. Standing over his shoulders was a familiar face, with a cute smile and great hair. It was Himari, and how she knew I was here was something I would like to know. The look on her face made me smile back at her, and Jordon on the other hand looked like he ran a marathon twice. ___"Damian, this girl was talking about you over near the entrance of the school, where the crowd was coming in, so I got curious and joined in. She mentioned your name and how you bumped into her, and wanted to see him again." ___"Yeah, I wanted to see what you were so stressed about when we met." ___"Oh right, well it's nothing that hasn't been solved yet. It's okay now." ___"That's great! I hope to see you again!" ___"Are you attending the Freshman presentation?" ___"Of course, I love watching the band play ever year." ___"So does that mean you're a Junior?" ___"Mm'hm." ___"I see, well you'll be seeing me perform twice today." ___She smiled and got off of Jordon's shoulder and ran off the to stadium. Oh right, we use the foot ball stadium as out stage. It has a big stage in the back, with a skylight above, so it's more like indoor field for PE. We rarely use it though, because coach says fresh air is good, and I have to agree with him. The artificial grass feels nothing like grass. ___When Nick got back, he had a sick looking bridge pack in his hand. He sat down, pulling the screw driver kit underneath his chair, and took the guitar from my hands. He quickly took the strings off, and then the bridge plate on it. After removing it, he quickly slapped on the designs, and then painted the hard to do ones with ease. After that, he pasted on the overlay to protect it. Lastly he put on another layer, with a glass design on it, which looked like it was 3D. ___"Wow Nick, that is one awesome job you did there, and it only took you 10 minutes." ___"With only 4 minutes to spare. Give it a spin and see how it feels!" ___"I began to play the song we worked on, and it sounded sick. It felt slick and easy to use. After a few seconds of playing, Nick joined in. We played it up again, just then they called me in for the opening act. ___"Go get 'em, Damian!" ___"You got it, Nick!" ___All hyped up, I walked down the center row of seats with my guitar in my hand. The spotlight on the stage, and everyone cheering, it felt so awesome. When I got up, I didn't feel nervous, but instead I felt so pumped and ready to do anything. The adrenaline flowing with 2000 students staring at me. I slapped in the amp cord, and I began to play a few riffs to start off. After checking the okay, I told Jordon to slap on the reverb on high. I begin to play a remix from one of the games I used to play. It felt so awesome when I got done with the introduction. (Yes I can really play this song) After ending the song, I did an epic hair flip and hopped off the stage, and everyone screamed wildly! I was so excited I began to ran straight towards the exit, but doing so awesomely, everyone got even more excited. After getting out, I sat down next to Nick. He had pulled out his IPod, which was surprising weird. ___"Hey Damian, guess what?" ___"What?" ___"I just recorded you playing..." ___"Are you serious?!" ___"Yeah I am dead serious, check it out!" ___He pulled it out, and begun to play the song. It sounded so awesome, just like the remix I found on the internet. There was some failed moments, but only ones you would if you were the one playing. We were head banging to the song, and when it was over, we realized it was time to see the orchestra play. ___Moments after hearing them play, Nick was up. When he got up on stage, and did a rock sign, and began to jam to one of his original compositions. It was so epic, that I couldn't help myself, and began to jam out to it. What a day this was, there was nothing to change it, my 15 minutes of fame, everything was going good. ___Soon after, the next 12 other students did their songs, and it was soon to do the ending act. Me and Nick looked at each other with great big smiles. ___"You ready rock this place up, buddy?!" ___"When ever you are, dude!" ___"Let's do this!" ___We ran out to the stage, and when we got up, we slapped on the amp cords. Quickly Jordon saw his signal, and adjusted the mixer, and grabbed his bass. We got up on stage, and he was also going to play. It was so unexpected, but thought it was cool! All three of us bumped fists and I begun to play the intro to one of Nick's epic compositions. Around near the end, we were so into, and so were the fans, we never noticed what was happening. ___I begun to smell smoke, and when turn around, still playing of course, there was a large amount of smoke coming out, and then a huge pop along with flames came out. Every speaker in the room popped. Just when you thought it was over, a large explosion from the generators underneath the stage blew up. When it did, I was sent flying all across the field. I hit the ground really hard and that's when I passed out... Stay tuned for Chapter 2! You can find every chapter on Notepub! Chapter 1: http://notepub.com/?note=58441 Chapter 2: In progress. Edited by Other Kris, Sep 2 2010, 07:30 PM.
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| Midnite | Sep 1 2010, 03:19 PM Post #2 |
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Moderpator
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I'll move this to fanfic section after you're done. |
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| Other Kris | Sep 1 2010, 03:41 PM Post #3 |
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RPG Maker Ace? Gotta win!
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This isn't a fanfic, this is a literal story, only one chapter since I have concerns of people stealing my work. It will be posted as a Manga on my publisher's site soon- if you're wondering why I posted this here.
Edited by Other Kris, Sep 1 2010, 03:42 PM.
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| Midnite | Sep 1 2010, 05:29 PM Post #4 |
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Moderpator
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But it fits more as a story-based fanfic section than televised broadcast section. Also, I don't know why prefer to use the word 'manga' over 'comic'. |
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| Other Kris | Sep 1 2010, 07:18 PM Post #5 |
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RPG Maker Ace? Gotta win!
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They are two different art styles. |
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| Nirvaxstiel | Sep 1 2010, 11:36 PM Post #6 |
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天才科学者てんさいーかがくしゃ
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Hmm, i don't really get the story, but it needs more characterization. |
Rocknarok | PhotoBucket | Deviant Art![]() | |
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| Aizirk Mayune | Sep 2 2010, 01:29 AM Post #7 |
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EGAO
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Good story. But we need a description what they wear, how they look and all that. |
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| Nirvaxstiel | Sep 2 2010, 04:09 AM Post #8 |
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天才科学者てんさいーかがくしゃ
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That's wut i meant by Characterization >_> |
Rocknarok | PhotoBucket | Deviant Art![]() | |
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| Midnite | Sep 2 2010, 05:58 AM Post #9 |
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Moderpator
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Then, manga-inspired comic. I wouldn't really call it manga unless it's published in Japan. |
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| OmegaZeroKiller | Sep 2 2010, 06:00 AM Post #10 |
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@Untouchable KRH Please include a description of what the story is going on(I am getting confused with the main idea of this story). If you can include that, the story will be much better. |
| Jack in, Rockman.EXE, transmission! | |
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| Other Kris | Sep 2 2010, 02:35 PM Post #11 |
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RPG Maker Ace? Gotta win!
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I haven't even started the remaining 3 sentences of the first page. It gets more descriptive as it goes, so please be patient before you read anything too awesome yet. Also, the publisher is from Japan btw, because I written it in Japanese. >_> REDONE THE STORY, PLEASE REREAD. THANK YOU. Edited by Other Kris, Sep 2 2010, 04:50 PM.
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